The Golden Path
The Golden Path

Reasons not to talk to Dave

One of the side effects of coming back from traveling is that you will talk to anyone. Anyone at all. You have spent months on end in the company of no one that you know, and are now quite happy to converse with other travelers, bus attendants, beggars, drunks, and any other random people you happen across.


This is probably why, when Dave staggered up to me shortly after I got back, and announced "People keep being orrible to me today", instead of moving away, I asked him if he was having a bad day.

This encounter took place on a bench, on the platform of a train station in Forest Hill, South London.

To be fair Dave was more than a little unsteady on his feet. He had that rouge blushed effect that goes with all the best alcoholics, wild eyes, a shock of ginger hair, and was about six foot.

He looked pretty much like your average unemployed, dressed in non descript black jeans, and something like a bomber jacket. He looked about 38 to me, pocked skin that had suffered the ravishes of his lifestyle. Although he swore blind he was only 22!

He was with out a doubt, completely out of his face on something, if not several things.

As he stumbled along the platform people took evasive action, glancing away before they met his eyes and hiding their faces in their newspapers. He came to sit on the bench next to me, and "bad arse young man" at the other end.

He wasn't very happy.

If I was Dave I wouldn't be very happy either. It can't be nice being shunned by the general public so blatantly. I think that's how he came to the conclusion people were being " 'orrible" to him. Bless. The thing is, it crossed my mind in my wisdom, that if people are only ever 'orrible to you. You are unlikely to be anything other than 'orrible back.

Anyway, me and Dave had a bit of a chat, he wasn't actually doing any harm, just muttering a bit to himself in a slightly erratic manner.

I asked Dave where he was going... "I don't know..." said Dave.
 
I pointed out that as he was at a train station, and about to get on a train, he must, theoretically, have some idea where he was going.

This got a laugh. He was going to see a girl. He thought she liked him, but he wasn't quite sure. He also wasn't quite sure where she lived. At a guess I would say it was somewhere north of Forest Hill.

He really was quite sweet in some ways, was Dave. Battered by life, but I'm sure there was quite a lot of good still rattling around in there somewhere. I got the feeling I might have been the only normal person he had spoken to in some time. i.e the only person who was operating in the same reality as 90% of the world, not one entirely soaked in and addled by drugs. 

Dave then decided that he liked me. I wasn't terribly surprised. If you talk to odd people you have to expect them to act in slightly odd ways.

Dave had a bit of a set to with "bad arse young man" while we were waiting for the train, but I managed to calm him down.

When the train arrived Dave had started to get a bit to close for comfort. I liked Dave, but I didn't think we'd be keeping in touch. When the train arrived I realised that I might have a bit of a problem. So I tried to walk into the carriage the opposite way to Dave and took a seat next to two extremely large Eastern European guys.

I can't remember the precise ins and outs, but I had hoped Dave might just not follow me. Of course he did follow me.

The two Eastern European guys didn't really share my ethos of being nice the socially down pressed, and after about two lines more conversation, during which Dave didn't seem to pleased with me, looked at Dave quite clearly and told him, in no uncertain terms "You.  Vuk Ofv".

Dave was not to be put off of course, so this soon escalated to, "Vuk Ofv, or I killl you."


Figuring I had kind of got Dave into this situation and not wanting him killed, I took him further down the carriage to sit with me. He carried on acting like a complete loony. He did a remarkably loud impression of someones baby that was screaming, and I had to calm him down again. I then decided it really was time for me and Dave to part company and employed my classic London strategy for avoidance of loonies on the train/tube. 

I waited until the train pulled on to the station, waited for the doors to open, suddenly jumped off the train at light speed, ran down two carriages, jumped on, and hid. In the crowd I cannoned past the two Eastern European guys and said thank you to them as I sped by.

After the train doors closed again and the train pulled out of the station, I saw Dave out the window, he had got off the train.  I think he was a bit confused about where I had gone. He wandered off up the platform and up the steps. Hopefully without bumping into the Eastern European guys.

So although I am still that strange variety of Londoner, that will talk to people I meet while I'm out in the outside world, you will still find that most Londoners, when on the train/tube/street, will talk to no one. Preferring instead to stare steadfastdley into space, in complete and utter silence. 

And I do have to admit, that in some cases, there's a reason for that!

Goodbye Country Hello Nightclub

Oh Boy, I'm back.


I haven't posted for so long most of you have probably stopped reading. Maybe I'm talking to myself here? Well it's never stopped me before.

So I did it then!!!

Not only did I do it in fact, but I did it, and am managing to do most of the things that I wanted to do when I came back. Including move nearer the city center.

The housing I must admit is not entirely sorted out, and it did take quite a long time to sort out to this stage. (Thanks Miguel!). I have in fact taken dossing on peoples floors to a whole new level. But now I have a roof, bed, wardrobe and broadband connection of my very own.

In the same way as when I was traveling, my life is still changing. I like it like that and me and bruv have got tickets to Groove Armada, possibly the best artists in the uiverse ever. OMG!!!! Maybe life is perfect after all. I don't think it gets much better than that!

So what do you get out of it at the end when you've dragged yourself across a new continent, pushed all your personal boundaries, and generally had the time of your life?



An overwhelming feeling that anything is possible. 

La Fortuna, Costa Rica, Two more weeks in pictures



(Puerto Viejo, Costa Rica)



Still going.....




Our new dog, alert and attentive (Puerto Veijo, Costa Rica)

My brother is here now for the last leg.





The crater of Volcan Irazu (Costa Rica)......





Sloths at the Sloth Sanctury



Met these sweeties yesterday, they live outside the house of the guy who rescued them and fly around freely.... aww!! (La Fortuna, Costa Rica)



It´s a hard life I lead, I really miss work........

(This bar forgot what our tab was!!!!)





The funniest thing I have seen today!!!

So he is driving with the other hand right?!!!

(La Fortuna Costa Rica)



Medic! Medic! Blogger Down!





She Lives!


Hmm so I have been "muy enfermo". This explains the lack of posts.

The last week seems to have only been about three days long. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday all seem to have blended into one day, and not even a long one at that. Shame really because it really was a smashing Saturday night!

"It" started on Sunday. I though it was alcohol poisoning at first. Then I thought it was food poisoning, when it got to Thursday I thought it might be time to stop self diagnosing and get to the quack, (doctors to my international friends). People had been trying to get me to see a doctor before that, but I had a bit of trouble in the state that I was, explaining in Spanish that I could not actually walk more than 20 meters without passing out.


I now know that I have an unspecified virus. I am a lot better now, and I can do stuff like..... Stay Awake!! Read!! and ....surf on the internet!!! My enthusiasm for life in general is also gradually returning. I do all this with the aid of large doses of sugar provided by Antigua's most lovely deserts, and yes there are a lot of them to choose from. I don't consider I am that hard done by, because a sickness that necessitates my sitting around eating lots of cheesecake and pecan pie is a pretty good lot given the selection to choose from.

I think whatever it is must be reasonably nasty, as the drugs they have given me cost $20 US, which is a hell of a lot of money over here. I have even taken to giving a few Quetzals to the disabled beggars in town. (Generous to a fault me...) They after all do not have the benefit of my Visa card and the GBP - GTQ conversion rate to help them out, (aprx 15.32 to the pound).

Reasons I am Unlucky

1. I got ill right in the middle of my Spanish Course, and had to pay half a weeks tuition fee for Nada!

v

Reasons I am Lucky

1. Antigua is the probably the most developed place in Guatemala, they even have ambulances here, it is a very good place to get sick.
2. Antigua is one of the most beautiful towns in the world. With the time and the money, you could quite happily waste away the rest of your existence here. Some do! So it is a nice place to be ill on that front as well.
3. I have got lots of friends in Antigua, who are looking after me.
4. I had my own room in a really nice homestay when I was really sick.
5. Jose is not going to take students to the bullfighting any more because of me being sick!!!!!
6. I am not poor and I can afford food without working for it, (well here anyway), and medicine.
7. Ad infinitum


Yes so the only bad thing is I have lost out a bit on the Spanish Tuition. However I was overjoyed at the end of last week to find I was actually able to communicate, (a bit) in another language. It really was coming on quite well. Not only can I now order food, but I can complain if I don't like it and send it back! I can remember saying a few weeks ago that if I could get to that point, that I would have cracked it! (It's not really as difficult as I thought to be honest). However this really does not mean that I can have "a conversation".

So if I can find some more enthusiasm, cheesecake and energy, more Spanish hopefully next week. I might even be able to elaborate on the current speech pattern of a five year old child.


Number five on the list above  leads to another story.......

On the same day that I started at the Spanish School, (the week before last) I was most dismayed to find out that the school I had signed up to runs excursions to Bullfighting.

Yuk.

A lot of you know I am a vegetarian, in two years I will have been vegetarian for more than half my life. (Only 11 years then!!!!) I am unashamedly, but with a heavy dash of reason, "Militant Animal Rights".

Repeat after me...
 
I am not against medical research, but I think......

So anyway, I wasn't´t too happy about the gleeful terrorisation and tearing apart of innocent animals as an extra curricular activity for my language school. 

I didn't adopt my normal, feet, vote with, policy because I was told that all the Spanish schools do bullfighting, which is how I still came to be with Ixchel Spanish School when the dreaded lurgee struck.

Me and Jose who manages the school ended up talking a lot about how much money I should pay, for which we reached an amicable agreement, and other subjects, like was I going to die of plague in the schools homestay? So we basically became quite friendly. An ideal opportunity to discuss the subject of bullfighting!
 
I have been incredibly disappointed on this trip at the number of (stupid... naive...ignorant...young idiots) people I have met on this trip (Ori), who although they would completely condemn bullfighting, cockfighting and other horrible practices at home, are more than happy to participate in them here. 

Personally (Ori), I think this is completely spineless.  Although  traveling does entail a strong element of the voyeur, you should not forget that your actions, omissions, and tourist dollars have a massive impact on the places that you visit.  One should have a greater sense of responsibility than to blindly blunder along with an attitude that often comes down to little more than "can´t be bothered".

Other people are fast to point out that you can not take your western, and personal, values and try to enforce them on the rest of the world. They are right. However considering that animal, and also humanitarian welfare issues are often largely due to lack of education. You can always respectfully show people that there is a different way.

So when all is said and done me and Jose had a pretty open conversation about it bullfighting, and Ixchel Spanish School in Guatemala are not going to the bullfighting anymore. I´m not saying I´ve converted the man himself, but it seems I have talked him in to adjusting the school program. 

The fact that I was out with Jose till three o clock in the morning last Saturday, and he does like my hair, (no of course I didn't,) may indeed be a factor, but does that matter given the result?

Never, ever, again, he promises me, and I believe he is a man of his word.


Ta da!


I don't have anything else majorly exciting to report. Well I do, but you have to understand that to some extent at least "loque pasa en Antigua, se queda en Antigua". Isn´t that right Belinda?

So I cant give you the details of everything...... suffice to say

..............maybe I'll tell you next week.

Here are a few more pictures of La Antigua instead.

Incidentally, its called La Antigua as it was once the capital of Guatemala, i.e Guatemala City. Now there is the new Guatemala City, La Antigua (the old city), or Antigua for short is referred to as such.


 





Tuc Tuc, the only way to travel!

It´s rainy season now, so I am also looking forward to the last spending splurge next week in Costa Rica and Panama, where it will be hotter. Antigua is quite cool. Big bruv has gotten jealous and decided it´s time for a holiday and is coming out to meet me. Then its homeward bound, to the city where the streets are paved with gold, good old London town.

Preferably before I file for bankruptcy.

The adventure is not over yet however, and don't worry, once it is I will continue to inflict my opinions on the world at large, about anything I like.

Phew, now there´s a relief to you all....


(I do just have to thank Darling Ali, The Tartan Angel, for the soup runs and the endless sympathy and help. I would have been lost with out you honey.)

Earthquake! ...........Copan, Honduras to Antigua, Guatemala




....."I feel the earth move under my feet...."




Well here I am in Antigua, Guatemala 



and the news today is.....

       


I was in an Earthquake!

Well, not in one, so much as felt one.....things shook, that counts!

I can't genuinely say it was all that exciting, but as it was my first ever seismic/volcanic event, I think it's reasonably worthy of a blog post, even if only for the comic way that we, (we being the average Gringa) did not have a clue what was going on.




(The average Gringa, above left, Michaela:Australia, demonstrates advance romance techniques for backpackers, below  Me:UK, Ory:Israel, Emma:UK, Belinda:Australia)


I was actually sitting on the third floor of a hostel, in a room with a balcony outside it, quite exposed to the elements, and as my brain tried to piece together the novel information which was filtering in via my senses, what I actually thought at first was that this was the sudden onset of really high winds. Like when the house shakes in a storm. Strange as there was no storm...

We really didn't have a clue.....

Here was the earthquake from our perspective:


Me: The rooms shaking!

Belinda: No it's not

Me: Yes it is...

rumble, rumble, shake, shake, shake,

Belinda: Oh, yes it is!

At this point I went onto the balcony, consulted with the neighbours and concurred that this was indeed the result of some kind of seismic activity.  We decided it was probably "just one of the volcanoes" (there are three here to choose from) and went back in.

The event concluded with..

Me: OK, lets go to the hairdressers then..

Belinda: OK

So I am pleased to report, that not only am I alive, I am alive and even more beautiful than before!

I know you find this difficult to believe dear reader but hey, you'll just have to trust me.

As an aside, I don't think anyone in this whole town who hasn't gone and looked it up realises, as I do (in my wisdom), that we actually shook with a quake that was 6.8 on the richter scale (at its epicenter), and it was not all that far away.


A strong earthquake hit Guatemala and parts of neighboring countries Wednesday. The US Geological Survey put the preliminary magnitude at 6.8 saying it was located 70 miles south-southwest of Guatemala City in the Pacific Ocean at a depth of 40 miles.

The trembler struck at 1:29 p.m. local time and sent residents in El Salvador's capital rushing into the streets for safety. According to Benedicto Giron, spokesman for the National Disaster Reduction Center, there had been some landslides in the southwest province of Escuintla. 

www.bestsyndication.com
http://www.bestsyndication.com/?q=061307_guatemala_earthquake.htm

I do actually wonder from time to time, being out here in one of the worlds most active Earthquake/Volcano zones whether there is any kind of early warning system at all that I might be privy to, and how that would work......

However having searched, I don't really think there is one available on the web, (sorry mum). All I can find is websites that tell you about the natural disaster and it's effects after it's taken place.

As useful as this, is I think I could probably work that out myself. One might, as we learnt today, notice an earthquake happening, and I assume a volcano blowing up would attract a certain amount of attention as well.  It's the advance warning information that I'm after......

If anyone has any links, could you send them to me!



Hey Ho...

So what else has been going on.

Well firstly I was far to drunk on Utila to post anything worthy, but have finally worked out how to put on pictures, as you have already seen.

Since Utila I have been trundling my way through to Antigua, stopping to see the fabulous ancient Mayan ruins at Copan in Honduras.

These ruins are really quite impressive. They are 300 - 900 AD, and built by various different Mayan Kings over those eras.

The ruins contain a number of alters, as the Mayans had clearly not cottoned on to a good veggie burger and really liked to kill things. They were big on Sacrifices and used to kill lots of animals on a daily basis. Dogs, monkeys, birds. However if they were really lucky they got to be killed themselves....

In between the sloping walls, and on the strip of grass at the center of the photo above, they would play an inspired acrobatic dance like game, once a year. All of the noble and "lower" families would come out to watch, and then the priest and dignitaries would pick the best player from the winning side.
 
This lucky chap would then be given the great honour of becoming a human sacrifice on the "giant hamburger" alter below. If you get up close to it you can see the channels carved out to catch the blood.

Lovely.

Ask not what your team can do for you.

Apparently it got them eternal life after death, but we all know that us modern folks would have been diving for the floor, throwing ourselves under the feet of the opposition, and doing anything else possible to ensure our continuation on the current plain of existence.



REFEREE!

You can even get in the changing rooms, here is Sam on the right, getting ready for a rematch with Germany...



There are various other things you can do to keep yourself entertained in a land without compensation culture......

When I first arrived in Central America everyone told me that Volcan Pacaya is a must do. It is.

As an aside there is an easy way and a hard way to do the actual climbing bit, .......




Someone I was chatting with recently noted that this is probably the only place in the world that you can climb up a volcano and get within 5 meters, (closer if you want to melt your shoes), of red hot lava. You can push sticks into the cracks in the earth where you stand and they catch fire before your very eyes. It's only going to take one tourist to fall in and they won't allow it anymore......

In the meantime

(click to see)

Tourism Guatemala Style!

Me and Belinda are going Hiking for a few days now. More later.

Utila Island, Honduras

Two weeks in Pictures:

Two fabulous weeks spent on and off the Bay Island of Utila in Honduras. Soaking up the sun, being able to wear shorts, hooray, going to La Ceiba Carnival, and passing my Padi Open Water Scuba Diving course!

La Ceiba Carnival


 




Cholo the Wonder horse


Emma, Geoff and me at the Sparkletastic Treetanic

I cannot drink any more this place is killing my kidneys....




Anyone thinking of going to Utila, go to Altons.

Samuel, is a dive master at Altons Dive Shop.

Sam helped me Equalize when I could not, and even swapped my mask for his under 15 meters of water. Now that's what I call a gentlemen!

Fact: the man is a superstar!!


Tina the Gringa, Los Zorros, Nicaragua




Here is the directions on how to get to Tina´s:

You go to Chinendega this is the nearest big town to her, two hours out of Leon. You go to the "other" market. Then you get on a brightly painted bus called "The Titanic", (yes really) to a place called Jiquilio. You then ask your trusty bus conductor to let you out at a shop in Los Zorros, conveniently but coincidentally called Tina Mata, (i.e Tina´s shop), 40 k´s into the middle of nowhere.

You then wander around, or into the shop....... (genius) asking for "Tina the Gringa" and they point you to Tina as she is the only Gringa, or female white person, there!

If you are me you do this having caught the wrong bus into Chinendaga, and so it is now dark,  and you are wondering WTF exactly am I doing down here on my own in the middle of nowhere and trying hard to keep your nerve!

When the man from the shop walks you to the local boy, (who later turns out to be lovely, and called Noel), and he then walks you the next 50 meters into Ranch Tranquillo, and you shout "HOLA GRINGOS!!!!" and they all shout back HOLA!!! you have never been so glad to see a gringo, honky, or person of any origin whatsoever who is expecting you and can speak English, in your life!!!!

I was rewarded for this expedition with two days of the pleasure of the lovely Tina Morris¨s company. (By the way all the keyboards are very different out here!) Really I was getting a bit bored of being in the company of young kids on holiday drinking beer at 11.00 in the morning and I wanted to see what it is "really like" out there.

What I found was a close community and some lovely people. I had what could probably count as my first, (faltering and halfway incomprehensible,) conversation in Spanish with the lovely Elgar. He is 17 and he works as a fisherman one day a week, and goes to school the other days. His dad Alturio (sp?)is what we, back in London, would call a diamond geezer.

He has done work conserving the turtles there, by himself without the aid of any project, and has saved quite a few nests by the sound of things. Benita, his wife is the leader of the local community. A matriarchal figure who has taken Tina into her family and looks after her, which suits Tina well as she works hand in hand with the local community.

(Tina and her community, we also might note, do not torture chickens like they did on the first project I worked on!!!)( http://thegoldenpathblog.com/2007/05/02/turtles-r-us-with-the-chicken-torturing-conservationists-1927-april-2007.aspx

Tina showed me around the area, the first day we walked along the white sand beach to the point of the Chinandega Peninsula. The second day we visited the neighbors at the only other backpackers lodge, about 20 mins away in this Nicaraguan community which is otherwise untouched by tourism. The backpackers visiting here are still few and far between. 

Plenty of the proper local neighbors had already dropped in to say hi to us at Tina´s place. We had Spanish lessons, Tina is a great Teacher and fixed Tina's "shower", well the shower area anyway!

The DIY supremo strikes again!!

It really is a lovely little rural community. There are pigs and chickens wandering around everywhere,  you pull your water out of a well by bucket. The kids play in the rough road, where mainly only the bus goes by, three times a day. The bus also acts as a delivery service and brings Tina her drinking water! You can write them a shopping lsit and they pick things up for you in town! Cows also amble past, with cow boys, as oppose to cowboys, on horses (and bicycles!) Although it is still hot, the sun beaming down as always, and something like 35 degrees, the rains have come to Nicaragua now and everything is turning green, as if before you very eyes. The beach which Tina's´s house is on is picture postcard, and at the peninsula point you can see where the currents churn together as the ocean moves in different directions. 

If anyone else fancies a visit out to Tina I highly recommend it. She is about 4 hours out of Leon. It is a great place to spend a day or two away from it all, and Tina can do Spanish lessons by arrangement. This is a fantastic place to practice as the neighbors are so friendly. Tina would be the first to admit that the conditions are basic, but the beds are clean and comfortable, and I got a whole room all to myself!! I was really well looked after throughout.

I am now in Chinendaga which is supposed to be the hottest town in Nicaragua. Fortunately it is only about 34 degree today. I think I have finally acclimatised as to me it really does not feel that hot!! 

I am still headed north towards the Bay Islands, and a friend of mine who I met on the road is there ahead of me. There is a carnival going on apparently, so I hope to make it for that. All I have to do now is get there!!!!

Loads of Love to all




Leon - Nicaragua


Hi All,

Thanks for checking in even though I have not posted for a while. So how much can I post in 10 mins before throwing self and pack onto a micro bus. ( No I don't know what that is either!)

Just to say have had a fab two days in Leon exploring the town.....  it is umm Nicaraguan, the mix of street poverty and brand new Toyota Yaris rich... reminds me of South Africa.

A few words to describe yesterdays day in the company of Sina, (like the warrior princess), Jack and Eric, at the beach:

bumpy bus ride, busy market bus change, chickens, street vendors, freindly Nica bus conductors being v helpful,  glowing golden sun, beutiful beach,  cocktail, great company, wonderful day. Wish I could post the picures to make youy all jelous but gota go gota go.......

Have decided beaches are great, so am on way to the next one!!!!

Yesterday sat on giant rock looking down the beach laughing, after playing in the Sea. Figured I really am "Living the dream!"

Love to all ;0)

Cath

Laguna de Apoyo and Granada, Nicaragua 04.05.07


OK so Hi all!
 
Here I am in Sunny Granada, Nicaragua. I headed north as Costa Rica does indeed in the words of Mr Horsford Cost a Lotta, it´s known for it!

Granada is a beautiful old colonial town where brightly coloured houses line the streets, whilst the locals go amicably about there latin American business.

I have been pleased to have a new friend here for the last week, called Alice. She is also a chicken champion, (you see I am not the only one), and it is refreshing to me to be with her after the chicken fiasco!

I have gone quite brown now and am doing the typical weight is falling off, even though all I do is eat fried food and biscuits diet. It is amazing what you can do just by not sitting at a computer all day!

We took a trip to Laguna de Apoyo. This is a huge crater lake formed by a meteor crashing to earth. It is huge! The earth must have rocked and whilst swimming in it I wondered what sort of climatic events it brought, as the crater is at least 7 km across.

So finally I have had an opportunity to investigate the environment a bit.... I have been in the back of my first pick up truck!

The ecological parallels to Africa amaze me. They have Jacaranda trees here, which is a huge flowering tree with great hanging seed pods found all over Southern Africa. They also share the same paper bark trees, great tubular green trunks which peel sheets of paper like bark,I have also seen these in Africa.

I was thinking about doing some diving, but I have decided to say here and learn some Spanish first. I have already discovered where the best bar, for travelers at least is, and we are going to start working on the local ones tonight. In the name of ecotrourism I have decided to shun the cheaper, more refined looking Spanish school and have booked in to the one that funds a project for street children instead.

So in essence, it´s hot colourful and dusty, and latin beats fill the street from morning till night. The markets hum with life, and the evenings are filled with music  

Now if you´ll excuse me, I have to go and brush up my Salsa. :0)

Turtles R Us with the Chicken Torturing Conservationists, 19-27 April 2007

 

North of Puerto Limon - Costa Rica


OK so here is the low down on the turtle project, and an original excerpt from my life I will always look back on it as!


Thursday 19th, get up in the early morning and drink tea on lovely raised roof patio of the Hostel Pangea until I have made myself late. Go to room and manically throw all things back into back pack and sit, stamp and generally jump up and down on it until I managed to make it close. Run out the door and throw myself and back pack into a passing Taxi within 30 seconds, much to the amusement of the security guard on the door and the taxi driver.

I then managed to actually get on the bus, even though I arrived 1 minute before it left and had the wrong ticket, thanks to a very lovely bus driver who ran off and changed my ticket for me.

I had so carefully gone out to buy the right ticket the day before.....    http://thegoldenpathblog.com/2007/04/18/do-you-know-the-way-to-san-jose.aspx
talk about the best laid plans going to waste!

So five or so hours, a bus, and boat later I arrived at the site of the voluntary project, and about five and half hours after that I found myself walking up a very long beach, in the pitch black, in the middle of nowhere, with poachers known to be in the area, and nothing but a mini mag lite for defense. The thought did cross my mind "What in gods name am I doing this for?"

I do have to admit that this project did not turn out to be quite what I had hoped for!

Although the work is damn hard, which I will describe first, its not the work that put me off... But here is the work.

First of all, its all nights, (and do I hate night shifts!!)
 
Hands up every one who's ever cleared asbestos enclosures at three o clock in the morning, and shout "yey - we do indeed hate night shifts!!!"

Now, anyone who has ever worked on a turtle conservation project will be like, yes, der, of course it´s all night shifts. If you were a turtle and you had to haul your gigantic aquatic self up a beach, dig a huge great hole, and lay 70 odd great big turtle eggs in a feat of strength that is Herculean, only they are of course ladies, (Herculeet?), would you do it in 35 degree heat, or would you do it in the middle of the night at some kind of sensible temperature? So there we are.

Well the thing is my first night shift started at 12 midnight, even though we had traveled all day, (a 7am start). I then finished at 5.20 am or so, and then got "lucky", and got the only day shift for the next day, and so was at work again at 11am. Gee I felt so lucky!

The first time you walk up and down that beach, you die. When was the last time you went for a 7 mile walk at 12 midnight? Well try it at 12 midnight add 25 degree heat, and then do it on soft sand. One of the girls vomited several times and had to turn back from sheer physical exhaustion.

So seeing some of the countryside and the wildlife, as I intended was never really going to happen. In this project what I did mainly was sleep under a tree. In fact all everyone does is sleep! They are all to exhausted to do anything else.
 
I did actually see loads, about 30, of the Leatherback Turtles and they are amazing. However when you´re that tired, you are not really that amazed. You just want to go to bed!

A straw pole of the volunteers there found that some of them had expected this level of work, but me and various others, did not. Maybe it was something to do with this excerpt from the Tortuga Feliz website....

"After your few hours of 'work' you can go moutainbiking, fishing, sunbathe on the beach, read a book in your hammock, drink a cold beer at "Mathilda's", play several games................."

Now hang on a minute, I´ve done all sorts of work, I am very well versed in what is and isn't "work", and I can tell you this was definitely not "work" this was  WORK!!!!!!

T
hey do warn you should be "physically fit", but in the same way as the work above, I think this is more like extremely physically fit

I also thought it was really quite mean the way the girl who could not manage the walking, instead of having the shift patterns changed, was dispensed without ceremony onto the next boat. This could be to do with the fact the
shifts were being managed by 23 year old volunteers with no managerial experience, not by the project staff, they were apparently not very interested in her problems.

So anyway I was going along with the whole Lord of the Flies scenario quite well actually. I did meet some really, really, nice people on the way in, big kisses to Calina and Petrick, and we were having an interesting time.

and then....

Well first a word about the guides. The guides are all ex poachers. They lived somewhat on the edge of society before joining the project, making a living poaching turtles and there eggs. Therefore they are all somewhat like, well, ex poachers really. On the whole they are really nice, although they do use the camp outside where the volunteers are trying to sleep like a late night social club.

I came back from night shift one night to find the one of them who does have a rather more challenging personality, (he is completely mental) raving and gibbering at me, like, well, like someone who is completely mental. So I ignored/humored him and did my paperwork, and went inside.

I then hear a noise that was really quite drawn out and disturbing, and in all honesty I thought he had got hold off and was trying to kill the project cat. This in the middle of the night and everyone trying to sleep.

So off I go to see whats happening.

It wasn't a cat, it was a chicken. He has in a bag in front of him containing a chicken and rather than, as thought at first glance, he is ringing its neck, and getting it badly wrong, I work out after a while he is just toturing the animal.

Now this came as a bit of a shock to me, but then I think a 5´10 of extremely enraged mad British woman demonstrating some of London's East Ends finest expletives at him at top volume, also came as a big shock to him. It stopped him anyway.

So there I am champion chicken, arguing with a mad man who is likely to pick up a machete if I am unlucky, in the middle of the night on a conservation project in the middle of nowhere, with no project staff coming to my aid, even though I had surely woken up the whole camp. Most of the volunteers were probably just as terrified as the chicken.

Now call me picky but for a conservation project, torturing animals to death is not exactly joined up thinking, or what I joined up for. Turtle torture, chicken torture, its all kind of the same to me. He did still kill the unfortunate bird I believe, but I did not hear it screaming so hopefully it was a better way to go.

My real problem with this place is that there were three other guides sitting there doing sweet FA (i.e to my international reader, nothing) about this. Apparently they lack the willingness to take responsibility.

I spoke to the man who set up the project, and we discussed the fact that the projects long term success depends on it being taken over, and forward by the (ex poacher) community. It was implied that he could not dictate to them on the matter. However as it seems that the responsibility lies with them, and at this point they do not take responsibilty, it left me  confused and questioning the structure and processes within the project

In as much, I did the only thing I could do at the time, which was to vote with my feet, and get on the next boat out. I was in fact in the company of various other people who were also leaving early.

We do have to note however that this project saves a lot of turtles.

It stops hundreds of the green turtles being hacked to pieces on the beach whilst alive, when they come ashore in breeding season It also takes the eggs of the Leatherback which is severley endangered and hatches them, as they are otherwise all stolen. So I can not really write off the whole project. One girl there told me of the treatment of live turtles in the markets in Nicaragua which is abhorrent. They keep them live in the markets whilst hacking lumps of meat off of them. The project also saves them from this fate.  

However, for me at least in terms of this one incident, poultry as it may be, they are not exactly practicing a holistic ethos!

and so ended the chicken chapter.....

I went back and had a drink in San Jose, it was much more fun!